Life has just sucked.

Well hello stranger! It has been far too long since I sat down to write a post. Life has been a complete roller coaster over the last few months. None of it has been fun at all. From sickness to surgeries, everyone around here has had something wrong. It has all put a bit, ok a lot, of stress on everyone but I am starting to think that we are starting to see a light at the end of the tunnel. I write that with trepidation as I don't want to jinx us. The stress has seen me taking comfort in my old friend, food. I think I may have even reached the heaviest that I have ever been. But I am not game enough to step on the scales. I am trying not to think about it too much but I feel completely uncomfortable in my own skin.
Why is food something most of us reach for to find comfort? It's not even that I have been eating a lot of bad stuff, I have just been eating way too much. I really need to exercise more, eat less and stop being so hard on myself.

My husband had an accident at work a while back and required surgery last week. It will be a long recovery & a long time off work. It was a long, very long stressful time leading up to the surgery. We are a one income family so this was a big wake up to me. In a split moment, things can change. What if my husband could no longer work? How would we survive financially? I have decided that after 16 years of being a stay at home Mum, it's time for me to do something to contribute to our finances. I can tell you that trying to find a job with no recent employment, it is the hardest thing I have ever done. Well, apart from giving birth! The rejection, the knock backs and the lack of response when you put your heart and soul into every job application....it slowly knocks the confidence right out of you. Hundreds, I have applied for hundreds of jobs.  I know that something will be the right job for me but the hardest part is convincing employers that being a mum for 16 years proves that I am up for anything! 

So that all is the reason why I haven't really felt like blogging lately. But now I have just purged all the bad stuff into a post, hopefully now I can blog again. Kind of like ripping off a bandaid...there I said all the shitty stuff, now let's try and have some fun! 

From Jos with love. xx